Thursday, November 15, 2007

Help Can Come In Many Different Forms and Shapes

Helping others is one of the greatest gifts one can give someone. However, each individual will offer help in many different ways, and I would like to present my way of helping others. Believe or not, I helped many times, and many times my help wasn't viewed as help, but I always believed in the long term help meaning that will last forever, and I am lucky to have my second half thinking the same.

Here is my magic list of items of which I strongly support:

1) Help your self first. Let just give you an example from the air travels. Not sure if anyone pays attention to the emergency routine demonstrated by the stewardess, but I do. When that oxygen mask is ejected, put on yourself first. If you will not, then in case of emergency if someone needs more assistance than you, without a mask you may help one person, but with the mask you can help many.

2) Think how you are going to help. It is nice to give little things there and there in case of need, but have you heard an expression when you give someone a finger, next thing they want your whole hand. Yes, some people will eventually abuse the free help, and especially the financial help. So here is the statement that explains it all. I think this comes from the bible, and not sure if these are the exact words, but if you give a man a fish he will eat for a day, however, if you teach a man to fish he will eat for life. Don't be afraid to give people advice and teach them, and don't be afraid to set rules when your help is abused. I rather teach people how to survive, than just give and see that on the end it is all wasted.

3) Help is not just about giving, it is also giving a mental support. Believe or not, such support may be indirect help, but it does gives one in need strength to go on.

4) When you helped someone, don't expect to get help back from the same person. Life works in mysterious ways, and the help will come your way in time of need, and don't be surprised that the helping hand came from total stranger.

5) Sleep on your helping decisions. I am strategic thinker, and many times people think that I am reluctant to help. But no, they don't see sometimes that there may be an alternative way to help, and not just one way. I think even the person in need, needs to understand that they cannot just turn the whole world upside down because they are the only and only that need help. Sometimes, I do sleep on my helping decisions, because I really think working in harmony together we can accomplish a lot more.

I would love to hear what others have to say about that, and if you have other helping suggestions that may benefit all of us here, please let us know.



  1. Hi!I tend to go towards helping family first, as they need the most help. Be it financial, physical or just being there anytime of the day or night to help out in anyway.

    This also includes lending an ear if they want to air something they have a problem with. I agree that No.4 is another important issue.

    One other I'd like to mention. Never promise anyone help then fail to give it when asked for.

    Sound advise again Anna, thank you!


  2. Hey Anna,

    This is a very interesting post, and let me tell you forehand that I agree with you.
    Here are my comments:

    1- Absolutely; if one doesn't help itself, what good will it be to others?
    2- Actually Confucius said that "give a man a fish, and he'll eat for a day; teach him how to eat and he'll eat forever". Of course once again, I agree: one must have a master plan of how to help others (sometimes we do stupid things *nodding* that will make us regret later in life). We must always think on the long-run...
    3- Mental, emotional support is many times the best kind of support one can offer. I read a theory defending that if people had someone to talk to, someone who'd listen to them, suicide rates would decline; depressions would subside...etc...
    4- Help for the sake of helping, without expecting nothing in return (except the satisfaction that people will be ok). True, many times help comes from someone you least expect.
    5- I love strategic thinkers, and of course I agree with you, once more: we must design a plan before acting so that the effects are longer lasting...many times people rush themselves into helping and end up realising that they have wasted their time...*nodding*.


    When someone needs help, I never demonstrate that I intend to do it; and usually things get done without people knowing that was I who helped them. I don't seek for recongnition, nor anything in exchange...I just want people to be happy and/or well (no, it's not altruism...cause I still expect something in return: people's well-being)!


  3. Great advice, Anna. :D

    You have a great story blob!!!

    Hugs, JJ

  4. Peter thanks for your comments. And thanks for another great tip: "Never promise anyone help that fail to give it when asked for".

    It is great that I started this conversation about helping. When I read your comment I realized something this morning (my time obviously, lol). Peter I am not sure if you realized, but you chose a life time job that requires helping people in need. And that is the greatest gift from you to all the people you helped in your profession and obviously your family and friends and continue to do so. Thank you. Anna :)

  5. Hi Max, you know young lady I am so glad that I found you, or you found me because I just cannot believe how similar in thoughts we are. In addition you can actually bring valuable information to my post which is greatly appreciated.

    Thanks for letting me know about Confucius, but I think I will have to stick with the bible with my family, they just don't know about Confucius, lol. However, I will remember to use Confucius when I have to use this statement on someone else. Thanks :))))))

    Yeah I practically don't like the glory myself. I am one of those, here you can have my trophy. BTW I get enough from my husband, lol, so I praise him back, and then we stop because we both aren't crazy about it, lol. Well Max, the greatest help comes from those who do not say much, and I sensed that you were one of them.

    Thanks for your great inputs, and supporting my thoughts. Anna :)

  6. Hi jj thanks for your comment and agreeing with me. We have different ways of helping each other in this world, and if comes to blogging, I have to say, your support to both of my blogs is a great help, and it is appreciated. Thanks, Anna :)

  7. Anna,

    You have been awarded, dear:


  8. Hello Anna,

    Oh that is so sweet of you :)! I am glad we found each other, too *bowing*!
    It was my pleasure :-D!

    "However, I will remember to use Confucius when I have to use this statement on someone else. Thanks :))))))" - lol you are so adorable, I swear. You are welcome, dear :).

    "I am one of those, here you can have my trophy" - I hear you...
    "BTW I get enough from my husband, lol, so I praise him back, and then we stop because we both aren't crazy about it, lol." - LOL LOL I know what you mean...
    "Well Max, the greatest help comes from those who do not say much, and I sensed that you were one of them." - my only comment to this is: *tender smile*!

    You are welcome, Anna...
    I feel that everybody needs support; and if everybody'd receive it the world would be less chaotic :).

    Cheers and I hope you're having a great weekend!

  9. I have always reminded my children about life's blessings, and the importance of caring for and help those in need. Because after all is said and done, we make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. And I kid you not!

  10. Max, found the award finally, lol, and many thanks. I will be making a statement soon, lol. Anna :) PS thanks for your lovely reply to my last comment :).

  11. Don't mention it :)!

    I will be anxious to hear your press statement lol :)!


  12. THE ANiTOKiD said...
    "Because after all is said and done, we make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give." - this is so true ANiTOKiD, thank you for stressing it out. I also agree with you that we need to teach children about helping each other, and giving. Thanks. Anna :)

  13. God bless Anna what a great post!!!
    I beieve so much in num 4) When you helped someone, don't expect to get help back from the same person
    this i do alot so does my husband we never expect anything in return even in terms of financial aspect we don't expect repayments we just give and let God get all the Glory... We simply say this we have given itis Jesus that has given this today go home and bless His Holy Name Ok we didn't give you this.
    we live like this daily and yearly too.
    then on number 5 Sleep on your helping decisions
    I am so guilty of hasty decisons most of the time and always the Holy Spirit tells me you shouldn't have made it so soon think about it alittle, sleep on it too and tommorrow make the decision.
    I also believe in all the other numbers thanks for this post will work with this later

  14. channelofhealing, thank you so much for your comment. Yes the number 4 is quite powerful, I don't really like to talk about myself giving financial help, but I wanted to say, that giving is powerful especially when you really do not expect back, it is like the pot full of coins just refills itself every time you give, and sometimes it does feels like that on my side. However, sometimes I do expect back, because it is not because I wanted back, it is more letting know others that they should have a better respect for the gift. I find that there is lot of abuse, and I have to keep my eyes open, because I really rather give someone who really needs it and respect it, and after all puts into better use, so that person then can help someone else - like a chain reaction. I guess that is me, just practical type of a person. The number 5, I know what you mean, but you know on the end, just remember you gave that person the moment of happiness letting them know that you care, and even if it did not worked out this time, it will next time. What I can see in you is that you are type of person that would jump into water to safe a person in need not knowing how to swim, and this is very giving, God Bless. Anna :)

  15. I like these posts of yours. You are very nice, kind and supportive person. This story as well as the previous one are very interesting, constructive and very useful and I enjoyed reading them. I agree with you and with the comments that other bloggers have already left so there is nothing new I have to add to it; I just want you to know that I like your blogs. :-)

  16. Hi! Yes, help can come in many different forms and shapes. I have found such a person right here and that is you Anna. Helping people without question and asking for nothing in return. Sharing your thoughts on life and your images that make one smile. The best thing I can do is to keep in touch and thank you for your help!


  17. Medam thank you so much for visiting and your lovely comment. I appreciate what you said. Hope to see you around here and on your lovely refreshing pink blog, thanks again, Anna :)

  18. Peter that it so kind of you to say this, I really really appreciate, I just don't know what to say anymore, but I tell you I am sticking around, because I stumbled on your blog by accident and I never would thought that the two different worlds would find such a connection, and I thank you to for accepting me. Anna :)

  19. I would add one more "Ask Help from others". I used to feel shy to ask a help from others, I used to think what if they refuse to help. Only when you ask, you will receive.

  20. Hey Thiru thanks for your comment and welcome to my blog. This is great suggestion from your side, and like you I am usually shy to ask, in general I just hate to put extra burden on people, and them worry about my stuff. One problem I have sometimes, is as I help others, I tend to ask those others for help, and it seems like I am asking for something in return, but I just ask them because they are around. Well, the bottom line is, they usually have good strong explanation why they cannot help me, at least they are upfront and do not promise anything, so this is still good. Thanks again for your input, and happy holidays, Anna :)


And now lets hear your blobbing, lol!